How should a 23-year-old feel about life?

Heyyyyyy,

Honestly, I know that I sometimes creep around this website like a thief at night, and i know that I have been away for over a year maybe lol. You lose count when you’re trying to build your career and wealth. which is basically what I have focused most of my time to recently.

But even in the craziness of life, God still saw it fit to make me older. In addition, that made me wiser and more experienced in certain areas, unlike 22 years old Derin. I turned 23 at the beginning of march(the 10th). For the first time, I finally did the birthday party I had always wanted, one where I was more self-aware and knew exactly what I wanted. My birthday was indeed magical. I cannot even put into words, or few words, explain the joy, self-knowledge and awareness I feel right now.

Just so you know, I’m only 23, and most older people say that you still go through seasons of self-discovery till you die. I’m open and excited about growth. On the 10th of march, I tried to write here and explain how I was feeling, but it was as though my mouth or hands couldn’t speak, even though my heart had a thousand and one things to say.

But for the most part, I felt a tiny, tiny bit of fear(just small). Yes, you got that right, fear of the future; in simpler terms, ‘anxiety’, i found myself wondering how i got to this new country and left all my familiar family and friends behind, i was scared and found myself wondering if i was going to be able to survive this crazy tax and no joy system. But for the most part, my heart felt relief; it seemed like I was finally doing all that I wanted; I got all the freedom I wanted in the world, with no one to ask me where I was going every second I got dressed. I felt like I could finally fly as high as I wanted, and most importantly, I had hope, but the fear was still creeping in, but in general, the hope for a better and moew purposeful future.